How to Deal With Ungodly People in a Godly Way

Facebook has become the gateway for people all around the world to reach out for solid advice about how to face, deal with and respond to troubling situations. I’ve picked a question from a semi-pro basketball player who is currently playing overseas. He asked me this question.

The Question:

How do you handle people who are jealous of you? They call you names, including the “N” word. I’ve ignored them for a long time. I know how to deal with them in an ungodly manner, but how can I deal with them in a Godly way?

My response:

My friend, I want to acknowledge your frustration. You may even be dealing with loneliness and being homesick. You have adult bullies on your hands. Some people, like animals, will prey on others who appear to be weak and vulnerable. The purpose is to gain popularity and power by making others believe they are strong; yet their actions indicate they are insecure, weak, scare, and unsure of themselves. Even animals have a higher purpose than power and popularity for attacking their prey. I hope you’re able to see how pitiful they are.

Understand this:

They are the same cowards who came to arrest Jesus in the night when he taught during the day in the synagogues. The same scaredy-cat who kissed Jesus on the cheek, took the money, and then committed suicide versus living the penalty of his decision. The same chickens who came to get Jesus with an army equipped with swords when he was only one man.

It is important that you understand the immature mentality you’re dealing with and how out of alignment they are with themselves and the universe. For all the seeds that they plant, they will see a harvest.

Three things to consider:

1. Just as Jesus’ journey was a part of the script necessary for the fulfillment of his purpose, you too, have to get the lesson that has showed up to serve you and usher your soul into a higher level of spiritual awareness. I would bet that this isn’t the first time you’ve had to deal with a situation that requires you to stand up for yourself. Ask yourself:  What am I to learn? What is trying to emerge within me? How am I to use this new skill for my good and the good of others?

2. Decide on who you are. It’s difficult to handle situations and respond to people when you don’t know who you are, what you value and how you want to show up. There are numerous ways to handle this situation. You could fight, tell your coach, develop your own relationships and create alliances, study your enemies and make them your friends, and the list goes on.

You have to make that decision based on who you are and what your value. Today, I would pull them one by one to the side and ask:  Have I done something to upset, insult, or hurt you? I would not fight or raise my voice. My sole purpose would be to meet with them, dump their stuff off in their space and leave it there.  What they do with it,  would be up to them. I would guess that most of them will be apologetic and humble.

3. Stay positive. This is not the end of the world, although, at times, it feels like it. Find people who think like you and connect with them. God always sends someone.

God bless you as you journey.

Do you have a question about life, love, professional or spiritual development? Submit your question or leave your comment below.

Copyright 2011 All rights reserved. S. Renee For personal coaching services, please visit For speaking services visit


In the movie Kung Fu Panda 2, Master Shifu tells Kung Fu Master Po that he needs to reach another frontier: inner peace. This opens up questions for Master Po. While pondering his existence, Master Po is called to fight a pack of wolves. In the midst of fighting the wolves he has flashbacks of his mother. With his energies diverted thinking about the past, he loses his personal power and the wolves escape. For greater self-awareness, Po begins a search for answers. Po asks the goose who found him when he was an infant in a crate of radishes and adopted him, “Where did I come from?” The goose was unable to provide satisfactory answers, so Po digs deeper and begins to ask himself: Who am I?

Intensely bothered by the lack of a resolution to his existential questions, Po is unable to concentrate. He loses battle after battle and consequently the faith of the other Kung Fu warriors whom he leads. The truth is known by Lord Shen, a peacock and evil ruler, who deceptively told Po that his parents had abandoned him. Unaccepting of Lord Shen’s story, Po continued his quest.

Guided by a soothsayer back to his past, Po learns the truth: that his parents did not abandon him, but rather sacrificed their lives to save his. This news strengthened Po’s heart. Returning to himself and a place of inner peace, Po attempts to convince Lord Shen to let go of his own unpleasant past. Shen refused to embrace self-empowerment and enlightenment. The driving forces of unforgiveness, bitterness, and jealousy compelled Shen to continue his ambitious pursuit to destroy Po.

During an attack of Shen’s furious rage, Po uses a kung fu technique that redirects Shen’s negative energy back to himself. Shen inadvertently cuts the rope releasing the last cannon ball—killing himself. Po, however, resumed authentically living his brand as the Dragon Master.

Since the beginning of time humanity has struggled with the questions: Who am I? Where did I come from? Why am I here? What is my purpose? What are my values? What makes me happy? What happens to me after I leave here? As we examine cultures and their political climates, societies struggle with these same questions. Most often the answers change as we grow, develop, and evolve. What I find interesting is that we frequently end up where we start, leading me to believe that we know the answers, but choose to explore our options, which is, perhaps, required for our growth.

©2011 All rights reserved. The Bridge to Your Brand Likeability, Marketability, Credibility  available in paperback.  You can read the first two chapters at


Under a tight deadline to complete some writing, with my manuscript and Apple laptop in hand, I arrived at 11:50 a.m. for a scheduled 12-noon lunch meeting with a vice president of marketing. We were meeting so that I could thank him for his decision to provide corporate funding for a fundraising event I chaired.

Engrossed in the writing, I was startled twenty or so minutes later when I heard a voice from the other side of the table say, “You didn’t think I was going to show, did you?” While standing up to embrace him, I began explaining my deadline requirements for The Bridge. Our conversation continued pleasantly, when in a matter of minutes a surprising, but welcomed statement poured out of the heart and mouth of the 50-plus, successful white male.

“I could never write a book,” he whispered. I was stunned at his unexpected transparency. But I instinctively knew and understood that this was a moment for us to connect on a deeper and richer level. Compassionately, I offered, “Even though it doesn’t look or sound like it today, I thought the same thing when I was writing my first book, There Is More Inside. In fact, in the first chapter I share my insecurities with the reader about how I didn’t think anyone would buy or read it.” My identification with his self-doubt must have created more safety. The muscles relaxed on his face, and he disclosed, “That’s exactly how I feel. What do I have to say that people would want to know?”

Having listened well to his earlier ponderings, I reminded him of a statement he had made about how he hadn’t realized how much he knew until the opportunity for him to teach showed up. Appreciating my reminder of his success, he took in a deep breath and readily nodded in agreement. The coach in me, however, wasn’t through. I continued to probe. “So, what would you write about?” He confessed he didn’t know. “What are you passionate about?” I inquired. His eyes rolled upwards to indicate thought. But again he answered, “I don’t know.”

The confused expression on my face must have prompted him to continue talking, and had I known the magnitude of what he was about to share, I would have tape-recorded the entire dialogue. From my mental notes and a few scribbles that I jotted down that day, I have recounted to the best of my ability this man’s profound awareness and insight. Listen to his heart.

“I’ve always known where I was going to next. I entered the job market and it was a natural progression. Next was just there. I would plan for my next logical step for advancement and professional growth. It’s laid out for you, an automatic sequence. But, what if there wasn’t a next? That’s when you realize, you left everything that you love and deeply desire on the sidelines for—next.  And, one day next doesn’t show up.”

We sat silently for a moment to ponder this undisputed truth together. Do most people take the well-traveled road laid out for them within organizational structures and systems? Do they wait for calamity to come before they ever seek their divine path of passion and personal self-fulfillment? When they find it, do they have the courage to cross The Bridge to get there?

©2011 All rights reserved. The Bridge to Your Brand Likeability, Marketability, Credibility will be available in paperback beginning August 15, 2011. Pre-order your copy today.

Should You Watch What You Pray For?

Has anyone ever said to you, “Watch what you pray for, you just might get it”?

Growing up I never liked that saying, but I didn’t know why. As I have come to understand God, myself and the power that is within all of us, I realize that it’s not what we pray for (request of God) that is the problem. It is a combination of the following:

1.  The words that we choose to send  into the universe, the conversation  with others and ourselves that either supports (or aborts) our petition and our thought life

2.  The faith that carries and sustains those thoughts and words

3. The choices that we make along the way that lead us closer to (or further away from) our desired destination

When I first launched There Is More Inside, a little over four years ago, it was my request to touch millions of people through the media, Internet, educational products and live presentations.I am excited to share with you that on Saturday, July 17, I’ve been selected to be one of two featured speakers at Kingdom Vision Buffalo. The purpose of Kingdom Vision is to bring hope, encouragement and transformation to the “forgotten city.”Gathering on Niagara Square in front of city hall, we will submerge the 20,000 expected people of Buffalo under the power of love, truth and hope.

Nicky Cruz, described by the Wall Street Journal as the Billy Graham of the streets, is the main attraction. Over the past 50 years, his message has reached millions.  He also has written 18 best-selling books and the movie, The Cross and the Switch Blade is the story of his life.

How did this happen?

About four years ago, I met Hall of Fame entrepreneur Chris Delprince. Over the years, we have shared uplifting conversation and life-changing information with one another. When it was time to look for speakers, Chris took There Is More Inside to the boardroom. The rest of the story will make history.

Will you join me in Buffalo? If you can’t, will you speak words of success for this event and the people of Buffalo?

As always, your love keeps me strong.

There Is More Inside,

S. Renee


As a positive, focused, high-energy level four soul, I thought that the days of senseless agony and spiritual torment were long gone. But I recently experienced divine intervention and
received spiritual enlightenment concerning a personal decision that I felt needed my immediate attention. In opening my spiritual senses to a fresh idea, I have found a new way of settling my spirit and getting a much needed good night’s sleep, even in the midst of facing pivotal life-changing decisions.

This year is a transitional year for me in both the spiritual and physical worlds. As I’m about to reach the completion of four decades on this side, I have found myself facing unexpected moments of uncertainty and emotional confusion. To bring calm back into my life, as always, I performed an internal self-check. I cleared out all thoughts and evaluated my own emotional and spiritual state. Once I thought that all systems were go, I asked myself: Renee, is this decision based on a deep rooted fear or is it based on your destiny? As I quietly sat in my meditation room and waited for God to respond in a profound, revolutionary way, I didn’t hear, feel, or see ANYTHING! This was unusual I thought, and, like many of us, I attached an explanation to the silence: “Wait on the Lord and be of good courage.” I never thought that I could be hindering God from communicating a very simple message to me.

With my perceived notions and high expectations of how God works and how to make a “good decision” I continued on my journey while being sub-consciously consumed with how I should proceed in this area of my life. As days passed I could feel my body becoming tense, anxious, and an unusual, long forgotten yet identifiable energy was surrounding me. No, it wasn’t the devil. It was my own whirlwind of conflicting thoughts swirling around me.

What started out as settle uncertainty began to mushroom into a full blown state of conscious anxiety. This was not good and I knew it. So, I raised my spiritual awareness to match the moment. In that instant, God made a simple, clear statement. He said, “Only Go There If Love Takes You There.” Ah, ha! I got it! God was teaching me a new way of making decisions. It doesn’t matter where you are going, what you are doing, or what decision you need to make, this is an uncomplicated formula. If the intent in your heart isn’t in harmony with love then you are going in the wrong direction.

What I now declare— as my truth— is that a person’s soul level doesn’t determine his or her experiences. The person’s soul level only determines how quickly and effectively it can acknowledge and apply spiritual weaponry, which is God’s favor and truth to the circumstance. If the truth that I have shared about “going only where love takes you” vibrates with your spirit and you want to use this prescription for successful decisionmaking, then consider the following.
1. Ask yourself, “What am I doing (or saying) and how does it serve others?” Although many of us react to what another person says or does, I don’t believe that most people are intentionally malicious. I believe that many people who walk on the path “lack knowledge” and thereby suffer from a severe case of low self-esteem. When we don’t understand ourselves, we feel powerless. When we feel powerless we compare, complain, judge and try to manipulate others. What is in your heart? Why is it in your heart? How can you release your negative intent toward yourself and others and replace it with the light of love?

2. Ask yourself, “Do I freely offer my time, talents, and services without expectation of reimbursement?” World systems do not carry over into spiritual systems. When you do something with the anticipation of a returned favor, you may gain the favor, but miss the divine blessing from God. Check your intent. Do you spread hypocrisy by showing greater respect and care for certain people because of what they can offer you in return? Remember, Jesus did not come for those who are well; Jesus came for those who need a divine
healer. Why are you here? Who do you enthusiastically serve?

3. Ask yourself, “Am I being driven by love?” We say and do all kinds of things for all kinds of reasons. In some cases, we don’t know why we’re doing them. And in other cases, we do them for egotistical, self-gratifying reasons. Check yourself. Only go there if love takes you there!

S. Renee, The New Edge in Motivational Speaking™ is an image consultant, motivational speaker, columnist and author of There Is More Inside. For booking information visit © 2207 by S. Renee Smith All rights reserved. No part of this article may be copied or reproduced without the written permission by the author

New Dimensional Thinking: How to Make a Quantum Leap in Your Confidence

Hello Ms. Renee,

I need your help. I often doubt myself in most situations. For example: I often think I won’t be able to handle the classes my major requires—physics and chemistry. Math and science are my worst subjects. I can do the work, but I will just have to work so hard at it. It drives me crazy. I try to stay encouraged, and stand on God’s word,  but my main phobia is failing. I get so discouraged when I don’t do as well as I would like to.  Can you help me get over this crisis, please?

Hello Friend:

Thank you for your courageous question. Every day each of us are faced with thoughts, feelings, and challenges that force us to face ourselves and who we claim we are.  That’s what confidence building is—evolving to a state of consciousness where we no longer freeze in doubt, but, instead, know that whatever decisions we make we can handle the outcome. In There Is More Inside, I explain that confidence is learning to trust yourself with your own life.

I’m not sure if we ever earn our own complete trust. I believe, however, that the better the decisions; the better the outcomes. Successful outcomes develop the trust that one needs to build a confident relationship with him/herself.

As I access your email and concerns it is clear that you are, as an older and wiser friend shared with me, “turning on yourself.” The admission that you “often think I won’t be able to handle the classes…” tells me that there is a battle. Like an argument with a loved one, internal battles drain our energy and occupy needed thought space for other important matters. This is what causes chaos and creates fog in our lives.

Quantum leaps always start in the mind. You may have faith to begin the journey, but do you have the belief system to sustain yourself over the course of the trip? As in your case, you had the faith to start college. Do you believe that you can finish it? It is important to have faith. It is equally important to have belief in the faith that you claim you have. You can’t “stand on God’s word.” You have to know and understand the laws and principles so that you can move in God’s word.

You claim that, “Math and science are my worst subjects…it drives me crazy. I get discouraged when I don’t do as well as I would like to.”  I hope that the results don’t come as a surprise to you. Words travel farther than you can see them go. Creating the life you ask them to create. Think of it this way. If you sent a package via one of the express carriers to China, you would expect it to arrive safely. Every word you speak arrives safely to the Creator. The Creator then assists you in creating what you’ve asked for. But, remember, you asked for it. It’s never about what you can or cannot do. You’re not the first person challenged in a subject. And, you most certainly, won’t be the last.

What did the individuals who were in your shoes do? They studied more, got a tutor, and joined a study group. I don’t believe that you are in a crisis. The person who doesn’t have access to food, shelter, clothing, education, and safety is in a crisis. You are learning, growing, and evolving into the person that the internal, real you knows that you are. When you seek, you will find the answer. Remain Powerful and always remember that There Is More Inside.

2009 © SRS Productions, Inc., S. Renee

The response is only the opinion of S. Renee. She doesn’t state any claims or make any demands that her opinion is right or that anyone should follow her advice. If you feel that you should seek medical assistance you are encouraged to do so.

Does Your Body Match Your Brand?

Over the years, regardless of race, age or gender, I have found that the size and shape of our bodies and body parts are of great concern to many of us. Instead of accepting and understanding that we are divinely made and the size of our bodies and body parts serve a specific and meaningful purpose, it is obvious that the images we consume on a daily basis impact our self-perception. I believe that these images distort our understanding of our divinity and sometimes take us off course.

I do, however, understand why we obsess over ourselves and our outer appearance. Statistically speaking there is a direct correlation in our looks and how much money we make. According to Sociologists Drs. Samantha Kwan and Mary Nell Trautner, “physical attractiveness is associated with a number of positive outcomes, including employment benefits such as hiring, wages, and promotion, and is correlated with social and personal rewards such as work satisfaction, positive perceptions of others, and higher self-esteem.”

On January 17, 2008, Faking Good Breeding posted a blog entitled, Beauty and Success. The author shared the following: Science Daily published an article that included a recent study showing that attractive people often receive better job positions and pay than average looking applicants. The study found that women were more likely to give high status packages to attractive men than men gave to attractive women. Isn’t that a trip?

I, like many of you, seek to achieve and maintain my personal best. In doing so, I’ve hired a personal trainer, regulate what I eat–but, like President Obama with cigarette smoking, at times, I slip off the wagon–and before going out play I put on sunscreen. I have to confess that, from my days of modeling, I still secretly shadow my nose (There Is More Inside Page 32) . As I explain in There Is More Inside, one of my clients told me I had a “big” nose and I needed to make it appear thinner. Ten years later, I continue to shadow my nose so that it will appear slimmer. Some may categorize my behavior as ingrained self-hate. Adding that if I were in a different country the standard would be different and thereby my behaviors would be different. I wouldn’t argue that point. However, I’m not in a different country. I’m in America. I believe how I present myself builds on the image that I’ve created. That image substantiates my brand.

I can’t see myself having any creditability as an image consultant or motivational speaker if my body and appearance doesn’t reflect what I’m selling. Perhaps you’re thinking that my message is, There Is More Inside.  That is true. I believe, however, that what’s inside is showcased through how I treat myself and my body.

I had a client who is a “motivational speaker.” When I saw him speak for the first time I was taken aback by his appearance. His pants were too long, his tie was too short, and he was approximately 100 pounds overweight. His image didn’t match his message and, therefore, directly impacted his brand. As a coach, I had to ask him some tough questions: Who is your targeted audience? Would the people in your audience look to you for answers? If so, why? What do you have that they want? Does your physical appearance match your message of hope, perseverance, and achievement? Is your message believable?

Branding doesn’t discriminate. It isn’t about being a particular size or shape. It does, however, require you to authentically show up. Does your body match your brand? If you are unsure, here are five questions to ask yourself to determine if you need to shape up.

  1. What is my brand?
  2. What problem do I solve?
  3. Do I look like the solution that I offer?
  4. Would I buy from me?
  5. What should I change to make my brand more believable?

I invite you to leave your comments or questions, and don’t forget to tell a friend.

New Dimensional Thinking: Are You Ready to Make a Quantum Leap?

In May 2009, I awakened to the realization that I was moving up within the level that I was use to operating on, but I wasn’t moving to another personal, professional, and spiritual dimension. I now know that there are step-by-step movements within each level. And, there are quantum leaps that lead to another dimension. Quantum leaps require stamina, focus, discipline, and the ability to graciously walk through intense turbulence with unshakable faith. The developmental process of quantum leaps is designed to sharpen discernment and discretion. From a spiritual perspective, I believe, the process is the prelude to a multi-level impact on the world.

Unlike level-to-level movement, quantum leaps are deliberate and intentional. A decision must be made to ask, seek, and find a new space to occupy and to make an impact. Once the decision is made and steps are taken, you’ll be introduced to who you really are in the present moment. There’s no faking during the quantum leap process–either you’re ready or you’re not.

Because of the intensity and speed in which you’ll grow, it’s not long before experiences are created for you to assess your readiness for the journey. In short, you’ll discover the truth of what you have learned, processed, and applied over the years. By the nature of the process, you’ll be exposed to what you know about the spiritual world, how it operates, and how to successfully and appropriately use the principals. If you’re not ready, you will swiftly concede and willing withdrawal yourself.

You don’t have to be “saved” to make a quantum leap. No one religion has the monopoly on quantum leaps. In fact, it’s just the opposite. It’s not about religion, denomination, or who is acknowledged as God, the creator, Spirit, or universe. It’s about the principals that every spiritually-driven human being understands about the unlimited opportunities to create from a spiritual perspective. Some people have even used the principals without acknowledging a God—they just apply the principals.

If you want learn more about New Dimensional Thinking, join me for a FREE teleseminar on Monday, September 14 at 8 p.m. Register Now! In the meantime, here are a few quick tips:

  1. Get in to alignment. New Dimensional Thinking requires alignment with Spirit. This is a process of syncing body, mind, spirit, and soul. Consider our TIMI Top Model Mentorship Program.
  2. Assess your life. There are people and situations that keep you at a low vibration. You have to ask, will this person or situation serve me moving forward? If yes, how. If no, have the courage to let him/her or it go. Download  There Is More Inside: How to Live a Power-packed Life.
  3. Create order in your life. External chaos mirrors internal nonsense. There is order in the spiritual world. When our lives and living space doesn’t have order, it makes it difficult to live in light, love, and truth.

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