Tag Archives: communication

Listening: The Best Strategy When Communicating With Difficult People

Personal Development, Professional Development, , , , ,

Yep! Some people are difficult to get along with. And it’s nerve-wreaking to try to communicate with them.

To mentally prepare for anything, you have to know what you’re preparing for. Most conversations are the result of something that has happened or needs to happen. Use this information to guide your thinking about the conversation. Remember, too, that you will likely be somewhat familiar with the background and communication style of the person involved in your conversation.

This knowledge makes preparation easier because, like football players who study videos of their opponents to develop strategies, you, too, will know what you can expect in terms of the person’s communication style.

I am not encouraging you to enter the conversation with preconceived notions about the person or what they will say. That is dangerous. Football players don’t review videos to make assumptions about the opposing team. They review videos to understand how the team thinks, operates, and performs. They use this information to devise their mental, emotional, and physical strategy to outplay their opponent.

By preparing in a similar manner for your conversations—taking time to con- sider the other person’s communication style, perspective, and possible expectations—you’ll prepare yourself to have the insight and stamina to be an assertive listener. Being an assertive listener means entering the conversation as the recipient. You are there to hear what is being said and to listen for what the speaker really wants and needs from you.

Always remember this: It may seem as though you’re in the position of power when you are talking, but that’s not true. You are in the position of power when you are listening. Listening is learning. When you are learning, you are adding to what you know about how the person thinks and feels and what that person wants to happen. When you are talking, you’re providing that information to them.

Click the link to get your copy. 5 Steps to Assertiveness How to Communicate with Confidence and Get What You Want.  

Copyrights 2018 S. Renee Smith, www.srenee.com. For speaking or coaching services call 888-588-0423.

 

Your Communication Style: What You Don’t Know Could Be Hindering Your Success

Personal Development, Professional Development, , , , , , , ,

Chances are, you’ve seen, heard, and experienced all these styles in your interactions with others. Your usual style will likely fall into one of these categories, though it may change depending upon the situation.

Where do you fit?

Passive communicators have an established pattern of deliberately avoiding conflict by withholding their opinions, feelings, and ideas from others. Because they fail to set well-de ned boundaries, their rights are often violated. Passive communicators feel fearful, helpless, and invisible because they ignore their own needs while giving others permission to impose their will on them.

Aggressive communicators can appear to others as selfish, immature, and impulsive. Instead of taking responsibility for their actions, they may attack and blame others for the situation. They tend to have a low threshold for listening, triggering repeated interruptions while others are talking.

Passive-aggressive communicators are a combination of the passive communicator, who refuses to address problems, and the aggressive communicator, who lashes out. The difference between the aggressive communicator and the passive-aggressive communicator is that the passive-aggressive communicator’s behavior is unexpected. They appear to be cooperative, but their real agenda is vastly different.

Assertive communicators consciously enter into an unspoken agreement for the purpose of exchanging opinions, thoughts, feelings, and ideas. This joint agreement comes with an understanding that there are indisputable rights and privileges for the individuals who decide to participate in conversation.

These rights and privileges establish a collaborative expectation that sets the stage for a meaningful and successful exchange. This does not mean that every exchange will end in harmony. Most often the target is agreement, but the key is to maintain the overall health of the relationship even if the conversation begins to get chaotic and ends in disagreement.

Do you want to improve your relationships, position yourself for a promotion or speak up for yourself?

Click the link to get your copy. 5 Steps to Assertiveness How to Communicate with Confidence and Get What You Want.  

Copyrights 2018 S. Renee Smith, www.srenee.com. For speaking or coaching services call 888-588-0423.

 

Break Through the Silence & Confidently Speak Up

Personal Development, Professional Development, , , , , ,

IT HAPPENED AGAIN. You wanted to stand up for yourself but didn’t. You had rehearsed your response and knew exactly what you were going to say. You even knew how you were going to say it. But when the time came, your heart started beating rapidly, your hands got clammy, and when you tried to speak, you couldn’t form the words.

I’m S. Renee, and for years, I quietly existed in that frustrating world, a world where I felt dishonored and often disrespected, but mostly invisible. After developing invaluable communication tools, techniques, and clear strategies, I became con dent and competent in my communication skills and how to use them. The impact of changing how I communicate has been so rewarding that I developed a passion for helping others do the same.

Since 2005, as a self-esteem, branding, and communication expert and coach, I have helped hundreds of thousands of people stand in their power and speak up for themselves in the classroom, boardroom, dining room, bedroom, and elsewhere.

I teach my communication method at colleges and universities, corporations, state and government agencies, and nonpro ts. Through presentations and coach- ing people of various ages, walks of life, and income levels, I have helped others gain assurance in the value of what they have to say and gain the con dence to say it.

Assertive communication isn’t just about standing up for yourself. Nor is it solely about overcoming the hesitation to share your ideas for fear of rejection. It isn’t even limited to learning how to muster up the courage to be honest with your spouse, family, or friends. Assertive communication is learning how to say what you want to say in a way that evokes a desire in another person to want to listen to you. It’s about being viewed as credible by your family, friends, teammates, colleagues, boss, and anyone else whose attention you are trying to get.

Here are the five steps outlined in my new book, 5 Steps to Assertiveness How to Communicate With Confidence and Get What You You. It is already  bestseller on Kindle.

1.  Know Your Starting Point. Know exactly where you are in the communication experience and identify your specific communication style.

2. Listen Assertively. Listen to what is being said without filters.

3. Communicate Without Words. Effectively use your body language.

4. Speak Up. Say what you want to say in a way that it will be heard.

5. Face Feedback. Courageously face what others have to say. Some of the information received will be helpful while other will be worthless.

5 Steps to Assertiveness How to Communicate with Confidence and Get What You Want.  Click the link to get your copy.

Copyrights 2018 S. Renee Smith, www.srenee.com. For speaking or coaching services call 888-588-0423.