Facebook has become the gateway for people all around the world to reach out for solid advice about how to face, deal with and respond to troubling situations. I’ve picked a question from a semi-pro basketball player who is currently playing overseas. He asked me this question.
How do you handle people who are jealous of you? They call you names, including the “N” word. I’ve ignored them for a long time. I know how to deal with them in an ungodly manner, but how can I deal with them in a Godly way?
My friend, I want to acknowledge your frustration. You may even be dealing with loneliness and being homesick. You have adult bullies on your hands. Some people, like animals, will prey on others who appear to be weak and vulnerable. The purpose is to gain popularity and power by making others believe they are strong; yet their actions indicate they are insecure, weak, scare, and unsure of themselves. Even animals have a higher purpose than power and popularity for attacking their prey. I hope you’re able to see how pitiful they are.
They are the same cowards who came to arrest Jesus in the night when he taught during the day in the synagogues. The same scaredy-cat who kissed Jesus on the cheek, took the money, and then committed suicide versus living the penalty of his decision. The same chickens who came to get Jesus with an army equipped with swords when he was only one man.
It is important that you understand the immature mentality you’re dealing with and how out of alignment they are with themselves and the universe. For all the seeds that they plant, they will see a harvest.
Three things to consider:
1. Just as Jesus’ journey was a part of the script necessary for the fulfillment of his purpose, you too, have to get the lesson that has showed up to serve you and usher your soul into a higher level of spiritual awareness. I would bet that this isn’t the first time you’ve had to deal with a situation that requires you to stand up for yourself. Ask yourself: What am I to learn? What is trying to emerge within me? How am I to use this new skill for my good and the good of others?
2. Decide on who you are. It’s difficult to handle situations and respond to people when you don’t know who you are, what you value and how you want to show up. There are numerous ways to handle this situation. You could fight, tell your coach, develop your own relationships and create alliances, study your enemies and make them your friends, and the list goes on.
You have to make that decision based on who you are and what your value. Today, I would pull them one by one to the side and ask: Have I done something to upset, insult, or hurt you? I would not fight or raise my voice. My sole purpose would be to meet with them, dump their stuff off in their space and leave it there. What they do with it, would be up to them. I would guess that most of them will be apologetic and humble.
3. Stay positive. This is not the end of the world, although, at times, it feels like it. Find people who think like you and connect with them. God always sends someone.
God bless you as you journey.
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Copyright 2011 All rights reserved. S. Renee For personal coaching services, please visit http://srenee.com/coaching_training.htm. For speaking services visit www.srenee.com.